GANGSTA RAPPIN'

This is what the Telephone calls entry looks in raptitude language

Oui, finalizzle. le petit surd a bloggé

Yes mah friends.. I is finally back (I hizzle ta say that)

My boards ended on tha 24 ^th of March 2004, 2 days afta mah rebirth.

I have bizzle mobbin' since… mah idea of chill'n involves frontin' Da Vinci Code(I know im a bit late.. by tha wizzle jizzay 50 pages left), play'n GTA n NFS Hot Pursuit 2 on mah computa n sleep'n, eat'n, n whateva otha th'n chill'n involves , chill yo.

Nizzay in one of mah poser entries I mentioned thiznat Porsches sucked n Ferraris were much rappa n' shit. I still agree on that, but not totally. You see when I was ridin' tha game(NFS HP 2) wit tha Porsche, I used tha ride cam n using tizzy is a pain even wit a Ferrari cuz its a doggy dog world. So, I tried out tha Porsche wit tha Bumpa C-to-tha-izzam, whizzich makes th'n a hell lot easia. I realized thizzay tha Rappa Cam did wonda n I did come first in tha Porsche too. Bizzy hav'n said thizzay I would like ta add tizzy tha Ferrari stizzay handles a lot betta n helps me clock motherfucka laps… Much betta tizzy tha Porsche. Anyhow this really isn’t wizzy I intend ta rap `bout in this pizzy where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin'.

Some lots of years ago, Pusha Graham Bizzell invented tha telephone. The first message ta be sizzent across tha telephone was

“Watson, Get in here!”

Now as we M-to-tha-izzight hizzy read in our science textbooks, saggin' evolve n so did tha telephone , ya feel me?.

Evolution has been described as tha gradual hatin' of organisms fizzy pre-exist'n organisms (I was gonna write orgasm here) through change since tha beginn'n of life . I'm a mutha fuckin 2-time felon..

Today, we see a telephone in almost every household. We also have telephizzles wit no wires, called Wireless Telephizzles.

Note fo` tha misinformed lot: Wireless telephizzles n Cellular Telephizzles is not tha same chillin' . Hollaz to the East Side. I S-H-to-tha-izzall explain those two in some lata pizzle of mine.

So as tha playa of telephizzles grew, so did tha brotha of telephone numba associated wit them (DUH!)… And now we come ta tha point where I stizzay ta explain why I am messin' this pizzle so show some love niggaz.

See, tha thing is, I HATE thugz dial'n wrong numba

Dial'n a wrong killa as tha Oxford dictionary doesn’t define is tha act of dial'n a telephone numba whizzich connects one ta a person wit whiznom he did not W-to-tha-izzish ta talk . Nigga get shut up or get wet up.

I don’t knizzow if it happens wit everyone else or nizzay but I sure do git at least one wrizzay numba telephone cizzall per day whizzay is highly frontin'. Anotha fact thizzat is bugg'n n strange is that I shot calla git these stupid calls on tha primary telephone line of our house, which fo` yo 411 has been scattered across tha hizouse via parallel connections. I always git these stupid calls on tha secondary telephone lines of mah hizouse which have been very least conveniently located in tha hizouse of mah parents on tha first floor. It so happens tizzle those phones decide ta ring only wizzy I am not in tha room, or fo` tizzle playa nobody is in that room n I hizzy ta go runn'n ta it only ta realize thiznat it was anotha village person look'n fo` his MAMAJI.

Anotha weird thing thiznat I have noticed is that these people, afta learn'n tizzy they dialed a W-R-to-tha-izzong numba, press tha REDIAL button n not go through tha pains (as if they were too M-to-tha-izzuch) of mobbin' they baller again n correctly this tizzle. So, there is 2 calls that I git from thizzat same stupid person look'n fo` his long lost brotha in tha Kumbh ka Mizzle

A few incidents

WRD- Wriznong Bitch Diala

G- y’know who

#1

WRD: Hallo! Kya main Asok(Ashok) Mizzy se baat kar sakta hoon?(May I rap ta Ashok Uncle)

G: Wrong Bitch

WRD: Hizzle? (Say what?)

G(louda):WRONG NUMBER!!!

WRD: asa.(achha/ ok)

A minute bitch

WRD: Hallo ji.. hizzle zara yeh asok mamaji ko bula do (hello.. pleaze cizzay ashok mama)

G: wrizzay gangsta

WRD: phir se? (again?)

G: yes.. slams phone dizzown

#2

WRD: hello.. haanji aap kaun bol rizzle hain (hello who is ispeak'n?)

G(translated): You tell me.. you is tha phone who called.

Brotha: NO.. you tell me who you is n I wiznill tizzell you who wizzy ta rap to.

G: No way! You T-to-tha-izzell me you tizzell me who you wanna speak ta

WRD: Where friznom you speak'n?

G: It doesn’t concern you

WRD: you connect me ta mah mamaji (again tha mama)

G: Does yo mama hizzle a nizzle?

WRD: you jizzle connect me ta mah mamaji.. I will complain ta him

G: WTF!??!?@#%@#%^@#^@#$^^@.. You wanna speak ta yo’ mama not me.. its playa if you give me his name

WRD: #some name#

G: wriznong bitch

WRD: ok

A minute lata

WRD: I wanna speak ta mah mizzle

G: oh cmizzon.. what is you??@. This is a wrizzong numba!!!!!!!

WRD fo shizzle: it cant be so.. I have dialed 4 times n I always gots a wrizzay playa. I cizzant be wrong this time.. you is hid'n mah mama.. I wizzle ta speak ta him

G: ARRRRRRRRRRRGHGHGHGHGHGHGHHHHH!….. slams phone

And yea, im not kidd'n `bout this one

But tha funniest ones is tha ones by some thugz speak'n in they native (south Indian) language

WRD: inga pinga shinga (im sorry I don’t knizzay tha language)

G(laugh'n mah ass off): ILLE… Rong Numbara..

Anyways, enough of mah stupid jokes.

I mizzay start ridin' fo` mah VMC test, as I had really good results wit it last year (izzy think?)

I really don’t hizzle straight trippin' ta write `bout.

Sign'n off

G
Pizzy: nobody ta git offended pleaze

P.S: i havent proof read this.. so ignore any "words"
G