
My Trophies
G
The following was an article published in Saturday Extra, written by Khushwant Singh
It’s all gas
Scholars pick up odd subjects for research; the oddest Ihave ever heard of is the incidence of flatulence:what causes it; what are its constituents and risks involved in exposing oneself to it.
One such field survey has been recently carried out, appropriately in the region popularly called the underside of the earth — Australia and New Zealand.
Breaking wind or farting as it is commonly known is too delicate a subject to be discussed in polite society.
Nevertheless, our Sanskrit-speaking ancestors drew up a list of their varieties from Uttam padvi (the best kind) to Gupt daan (silent, stinking gift). Arabs regarded it as a social sin and ostracised men and women who did it in public.
On the other hand, there was a Frenchman who made his living blowing off a candle from a foot’s distance by a violent expulsion of wind from his derriere.
A newspaper clipping from an Australian daily sent to me by a friend living there summarises his findings. Both men and women break wind on an average of 14 times in 24 hours; wind-producing foods include beans, cabbage, cheese, eggs and fizzy drinks; a fart comprises 59 per cent nitrogen, 20 per cent hydrogen, 9 per cent carbondioxide 7 per cent methane and 4 per cent oxygen. They can travel at a speed of three metres per second. What makes some farts stink is hydrogen sulphide which contains sulphur and is less than 1 per cent of its constituents. It is believed to be inflammable. Research scholars are testing it by putting match sticks close to their ends to see it is correct. Setting one’s bum on fire is a small price to pay for discovering the truth.
Between the penis and the mathematical one . . . there exists nothing. Nothing! It is a vacuum.
[Fr., Entre le penis et les mathematiques . . . il n'existe rien. Rien! C'est le vide.]
Author: Louis-Ferdinand Celine
Source: Voyage au bout de la nuit
A very happy new year to all of you.
It’s been a long year, and it’s been a good year. As a matter of fact, its been my best year so far.
I went to
Coming back from
I then entered Class 11, 11-J to be more precise. The only person I knew(when I entered it) was Siddharth Nangia, who happened to be with us during the French Trip. I still cant stop laughing at Siddharth holding up a banner which read 11-J in BIG BOLD LETTERS, and in Times New Roman Font Face, which had been handed to him by none other than our very own class teacher, Mr. Anil K. Verma. Our Class Teacher is a class apart, he like to keep the ball Rawling.
Class 11-J doesn’t quite seem like a class of 16 year olds, but this can be only experienced when you listen to the utterly crappy jokes of GP and Co.
Anyways,
Class 11 is quite tiresome and kicks you in the butt and makes class 10 feel like cakewalk. I joined Fiitjee on 6th August and have never enjoyed a Weekend since then. Small Price to pay when your goal is IIT. Class 11, contrary to popular belief, is not the year to partay. And if you think it is the year to partay, and if you do manage to partay through it, have a look at your report card.
The only way you can have fun in class 11 is if you are an Exun Member, or a classmate of an Exun Member. It sure was fun sneaking out of Maths Class when we did not feel like studying.
It is also fun telling a teacher like Ms. Vanita Sehgal that she doesn’t have the brains to read Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy(It aint my fault she didn’t get find it funny)
Nonetheless, School did seem nice this past one year. I met some great people in school, strengthened some old friendships, and had a blast my own little way (sneaking out of class and playing H2G2)
The exceptionally great people from school that I met over the past one year, are exceptionally great. They changed my view of not believing in the concept of having friends because you need them and its cool to have them around to share your joys and sorrows (oh the clichés). But, I did share my joys and sorrows with them.
I made lots of Friends, yes I mean real friends. Mostly by bugging them in the Egurucool Lab(We exunites just call it DA LAB) when they were trying to work, print a magazine, print their reccos, print their forms, print anything. I also made friends by stealing pens during MUN.
These guys and gals have helped me get through this academically tormenting year. Thanks y’all!
The sad thing is, most of them are going to pass out of school this march. Sad. But, Life goes on.
EXUN. Exun is an essential part of my school life and being a member always has its benefits. You are automatically sent to DA LAB to take a print out of anything. The computer teacher(at least Mr. Dey) doesn’t say anything to you for missing his classes. I cant imagine life without EXUN. This year saw the tenth year for Exun, the symposium and what better way to celebrate than to make the greatest Intro Video ever. And im not joking. Its not everyday you hear people say, “Ahhh!.. so that’s why they got Sony as their Sponsor”. Certainly, we are the experts.
MUN was another fun thing. Much more fun than last year, particularly because I got to miss my FIITJEE class and be there all the three days. This year, I held the post of the USG – Information and Computer Services and yes its fun being that. I did manage to scare this little kid at Eatopia when he saw me with my big head(because of the turban on). I have already mentioned how I made friends here.
In the year 2005, I was also offered the Singapore International Airlines(SIA) Youth Scholarship to pursue my pre-university(year 11 and 12) level education in one of
I also happened to witness the Scribbler’s Day where about a thousand dipsites of class 12 are released in the football field and they write all sorts of messages on each others shirts because its their last day as normal dipsites after which they must study for their exams. Sad. But life goes on.
I shall miss you guys, thanks for making this year worthwhile for me.
As I bid goodbye(or as I already have) to this great year, I hope that this new year brings the same challenges and joys and people. Now I understand why being 16, is what it is. Id rather be 16 till I die. But nonetheless, I am going to be 17, which by any means is old. Also, this shall be my last year as an exunite, and as a dipsite. Sad. But life Goes on.
Signing off
G
PS: Ill be back